Happy two digit birthday...all of ten my darling

My darling Nammu,
As you turn ten today, I thank the Almighty for having bestowed on the family such a beautiful blessing ..You. How fast the ten years have flown by! As I vividly recollect the day u were born and I was able to hold you in my hands, I realize you are my world, my life and my life line..God's greatest and most precious gift to me....

You are a big girl now Nammu, and I know you have thousands of ideas, goals and thoughts in your mind...Your likes and dislikes are slowly setting in and you have started narrowing down on your goals (at least immediate ones) .It will b a few years from now that you would finally set your heart and mind on what you want to achieve in life, what you ultimately would like to pursue as your career and so on...
However, I want to share a few of my thoughts as you step into the shoes of  A BIG GIRL...
Remember my love, you are you and you need not change yourself just to please your friends or classmates. As of now, you may not be in a position to take a final decision on anything , but your Amma and Papa are there for you and till about the time you feel you can take decision on your own, they will be your best advisers. Remember my love, after a few years you will feel you can decide for yourself, but  it will be better to take their opinion too. Why I say this is because , your parents are your best advisers, most positive critics and strongest admirers.
I understand  you have taken over from Amma a very beautiful responsibility....of lighting the holy lamp in front of  God...I really feel proud of you. It is indeed a positive and admirable thing that you 'believe'. All said and done, it is really wise to believe in a power above us, immaterial of the name you give to that supreme power. I call it Nature. You call it Thampatty now and gradually u will start giving different names to that power...The name , does not matter at all ...My dear, let your mind not dwell on any religion or social division. I hope and wish you will believe in treating everyone equally, Do not ever keep a grudge in your mind , but do not let any one wrong you.
 I am glad you worship the creator of the Universe, but I would rather you worship also your parents for whom you are The Universe,  my love. Obey them, make them happy , because their ultimate aim is your happiness.
It is really heartwarming that you care a lot for your Amma and Papa. They, and only they are the ones who have and can ever give the best to you and make you emotionally strong. Do not ever let any one or anything influence you to change in a way you don't want to. Don't ever feel what any one other than your parents will think or react to , your behaviour. I am not asking you to b rude, but always have the audacity to say NO albeit politely.
My darling , my dearest Nammu, do you remember how eager you used to be to reach your tenth birthday, and used to say, "Ammamma when I turn ten, will you allow me to cross the road on my own and go and drop a letter in the post box?"Times have changed and I know you can b on your own and are a lot more independent than the girls of your age in this part of the world. I feel extremely proud of your talents, your ability to communicate and of course your eagerness to read voraciously.
As you turn ten and walk towards your teens and then your adulthood, I pray to the almighty to bestow on you all blessings to make you a strong, talented, beautiful(in looks, in thoughts and in the heart), compassionate and lovingly lovable lady. Remember my love, You are my Life, my World and the most precious person in my life. Love you with all the love inside me, and always pray for your well being. You are ammamma's precious gem Namla.....

With hugs to my darling ,
Your very own Ammamma





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With Love and Prayers for you my little one!!!!!!

Dearest Sreekutty,

 As u set out on a new and exciting journey of your life, here I am  on top of the world, reminiscing, exulting,and my heart and soul puffed up in pure joy......
 
You have entered the gates of that prestigious campus which I left about four decades back.....You have decided to get yourself empowered and  academically and emotionally enrich yourself from the the same place which empowered me and enriched me and moulded me into a different person. The naive, bewildered teenager ,who entered the gates of that magnanimous structure called Arts Faculty, came out of it as a confident, empowered young lady, ready to face the world.

 I have had a secret wish to see my children too  get empowered by the same prestigious Delhi University.Somehow things did not happen as I wished and hoped, but after four decades my dream of seeing at least one of my children as a full fledged product of Delhi university  is to be fulfilled. I have always related the North Campus as Delhi University..may be because in those days that is how it was. Well...all said and done...Delhi University ,is even now the pompous, majestic and prestigious institution it used to be . I feel overjoyed that my darling child, my Sreekutty has entered the thresholds of this place and is to be a post graduate from the same place which made me that.and much more.

As I write this, my thoughts go back to the day March 5,1995 when u entered this world and I literally cried out in sheer joy and ecstasy. To this day March 5,1995 is the first day of my life that I was overjoyed. Incidentally the other two days being September 19,2006  and February 8th.,2013.

Somehow, I always have seen traces of myself in you.  We are to a great extend similar in our thoughts, our passion for certain academic subjects, our look out towards life and many such small things. I wouldn't ever want you to be like me, but I am puffed up that you have chosen to pursue your academic journey at the same place as mine. I want you to be  more confident a  person, surer of yourself and unlike me strong enough to live for yourself and never ever divert from your likes and dislikes to keep your dear ones happy, and I want you to face the world as a strong willed person who can not be taken for a ride.

 Love with all your heart, but let not your love be your weakness , let it make you stronger. Let not sacrificing your wishes  be the ways to show your love , let care for those who need you be your way but let not care for others make you careless towards yourself. Make your academic journey the best journey by completely immersed in it. Be sure to take the path that you  think is right. Let none influence your thoughts and path.

Too much advice? Well...I just want my exultation to be pure and meaningful in that you reach the goal to which you have set out,  to be reached the way you want it to be. I am totally in a state of euphoria my dear...Let my prayers, my good wishes and my hopes reach you in a way to make you also ecstatically happy after years when you talk to your next generation about your experiences in you journey called life.
 SO, HERE IS TO A FRUITFUL, EMPOWERING PHASE OF YOUR JOURNEY Dearest Sreekutty

Yesterday when I opened my Facebook page I saw a line...What is on your mind? I have seen this line earlier too but never gave a thought to it or rather ignored it.... Yesterday after I retired for the day and was in my bed pondering, reminiscing , evaluating or reliving through the day that passed by, somehow "What is on your mind" came back to me. Many thoughts and ideas cross my mind throughout the day while I work in the kitchen or when I sit relaxing or doing some random work, or even just like that. Some thoughts pass away the same way as they come, some linger on and gradually fade away......but something which has been in my mind for the past many days or even longer I am not able to get  off my mind...That probably is actually 'ON MY MIND' and I should be sharing ....
    I have watched a number videos and read a number of posts on the internet and the social net work glorifying mother hood and the sacrifices made by parents and how the off springs forget about all that and end up sending their parents to old age homes. I have also felt a lump in my throat wathing and reading the sorry plight of these parents and have shared those write ups and videos. We get to read about and watch how the life in a peaceful love filled family changes to a tearful and quarreling one after the son brings home a wife. Always the blame is on the son 'who has changed' or the'daughter-i-law' who has completely 'confiscated' the loving son thus changing his priorities. Then we have the picture of a mother-i-law who tries to find fault with the son and his wife for having brought all the calamities to the house. It is what we get to see on the internet, movies and also get to read .....but What has been on my mind for the past few months is.....

.Can we generalise things when such things happen in not more that 5% of the households? Has any one ever thought about the sons who sacrifice their many pleasures to see their parents and siblings smile? Has any one made videos about that daughter who has left her family and parents, her familiar surroundings and neighborhood to join the husband's family? Has any one tried to write about the adjustments she has to make to be happy and make her husband and her new family smile? Has any one ever thought about the mother who has embraced a new daughter to the family and has been in turn embraced back as 'amma' or 'ma'? Why don't we have stories and videos which glorify such new found happiness and the saga of umpteen positive families where the mother-in-law  father -in-law , daughter-in-law and son -in-law are freed from the tag 'in-law' and have a peaceful happy life?

 These videos and write ups about sons changing their priorities, sending parents to old age homes, and daughters-in-law and mothers-in-law acting with vengeance and negativity only leave us putting a stamp of negativity in our otherwise happy thoughts, we also tend to look for loop holes in our lives to match what we believe is going on in the world.This in turn makes us depressed and looking at things differently. On the other hand if we get to watch or read positive videos and stories about the new found daughters, sisters,  mothers, sons, fathers and brothers after a marriage, we would try to be more positive in our outlook.  If we have some problem in maintaining the new found relations in the family, we would try to find loop holes in the prevailing negative atmosphere to usher in positive vibes and make our lives happier. More and more daughters would free themselves of the tag 'in-law and so would more mothers and sisters.....Thus we will have more sons who can have peace and happiness and not been pictured as..Humara beta tho badal gaya ( our son has changed).

 These thoughts have been there in my mind for long and I felt I should share. I sincerely hope those who read this would accept the positive vibe that is intended to be projected..